The Commando Mouse Brigade

Last Updated on September 21, 2022 by Tom Kane

Brown snakes on the Pacific Island of Guam are so much out of control, causing problems for the local bird population, i.e., eating the birds, and even causing power outages, that the authorities have employed parachuting Ninja Mice to hold back the invasion. Okay, so I’ve stretched the story a bit, they are not Ninja Mice, but simply dead brown mice. Ninja Mice makes much more interesting reading, don’t you think?

In reality the authorities on Guam have laced the mice with a painkiller that is harmless to other animals, but deadly to the aforementioned snakes.

The mice are being dropped from helicopters over the infected area and each rodent, which are already dead, has a small cardboard parachute attached to them. This parachute will open and catch in the trees, to leave the poor mouse dangling and waiting for a passing snake to take a shine to it, slither up (yes, some snakes are great tree climbers) and eat the mouse. That should be the end of the snake.

Gruesome does not even start what I’m feeling. But I suppose it’s either that or you end up with no birds in Guam, but plenty of potential shoe leather.

Geronimo!!!

UPDATE: I’ve tried to get an update from this piece I wrote nine years ago, but it seems either the experiment failed and all involved were too embarrassed to write about it, or it’s not newsworthy. Either way, after several mouse drops the news has tailed off (forgive the pun) and I’m none the wiser about the war on brown snakes in Guam. I suspect the snakes are winning.

You just can’t judge a book by its cover. So maybe you would like to read one of my books as well as admire the cover.